The first time you get pregnant you don’t know what to expect. You buy books, or join online groups, follow each day meticulously. You would most likely know what fruit or vegetable your baby is the size of at any given moment and if asked, “How far along are you?” could answer “16 weeks and 4 1/2 days.” The process is fun. The second time you get pregnant is a bit different. You are excited to see the plus sign on the stick, but when that first wave of nausea hits, you all of a sudden have a sinking feeling in your gut and remember “oh goodness, how did I forget about THIS!?” What goes from being a fun process, or random science experiment taking place in your body, becomes symptoms, discomfort and seemingly endless waiting. Waiting is not something that we human beings do well, am I right?
I think this time around I am trying to recapture some of that joy in the process mentality that I had when I was pregnant with BQ. It is a bit easier right now since I am at 14 weeks and have entered a wonderful stage of the pregnancy. I feel great, I’m not huge and I like to eat. Am I eager for this babe to make his/her entrance, um yes. But I want to live these days as a family of four really well, and fully. Here we are about to move in FOUR days, how did that happen so fast, and are starting a new adventure together. The girls are at a great stage where we can eat at a restaurant fairly confidently, go new places with minimal gear and the tantrums are fewer and fewer each day. Come December, things will change and for a season some of the patterns and grooves of our current life will be forever altered. I can’t wait for the shakeup, to meet this sweet new baby that I’m already so in love with, and to watch the girls love on their new sibling. Have I mentioned that BQ frequently asks to “snuggle” with the baby and that the reason she wants to move west “tomorrow” is because that means it’s sooner to the baby coming out? Love her, how precious is that? And while I’m on the subject, she told me yesterday, “Mommy, I loved you even before I came out of your tummy.” Yep, I am definitely keeping that one. 🙂
At any rate, I think we all have times in our life, that have nothing to do with pregnancy, that are about waiting. Knowing that what we want will most likely happen but that there is a process we undoubtably must go through first. Expectant adoptive parents are professionals at this waiting game, but man isn’t the
JOY that we see in watching them meet their children for the first time better than just about anything? The deeper and longer the process, the greater the potential for joy. Doesn’t that make the wait totally worthwhile? I sure think so. Just like the times when I allow my tea bag to sit for just another minute are worth the tastier tea, savoring the process makes the result of just about anything in life a billion times richer and an even bigger celebration. So hang in there and get comfortable. Enjoy the ride.