Kid Skills

Have you ever noticed that your children have some skills that border on genius? I mean seriously, how do they learn how to do these things so well in such a short amount of time? In order to not forget these amazing accomplishments I am recording them for all the world to see. Feel free to give a shout out if your child is just as cool, because I’m sure mine aren’t alone.

Drumroll…

1. Kids are amazing at finding really gross things in public to touch and at times eat. This skill can be seen in all its glory in your local public restroom. I mean, wow.

2. Nose picking. If there is something in there, they will find it. If not they will look anyway.

3. High pitched sounds. I mean, there are times when I believe my children can communicate with all the animals of the world as they omit ear-piercing screeches to the heavens.

4. Being cute. Let’s face it, no matter what I do to my hair or what I wear I can’t even come close. They master this wearing nothing but dirt and they make it look so easy.

5. Dawdling. Do you have only 15 minutes to get out the door? They can make that 30, maybe even 45 if there is a wardrobe malfunction or a shoe that simply must be put on “BY MYSELF” even though it involves lots of straps.

6. Being edibly kissable. Those cheeks, the squishy arms, that succulent belly. Wow. When the first adjectives that come to one’s mind to describe a child usually pertain to food now that is a skill to be recognized.

7. Managing to get food into crevices and parts of their bodies you never thought possible. When you’re tucking that sweet babe into bed you notice something behind her ear. What was that? Oh yes, a bit of sweet potato from three nights ago. Amazing.

8. They are hilarious! From their misinterpretation of song lyrics, (Mommy what does, “RED everything BLACK God made” mean? Oh sweetie, do you mean, “LET everything THAT God made…”) wardrobe choice, funny phrases or simply the cuteness of their little voices. I find myself in a constant set of hysterics around these little ladies.

9. Public meltdowns. You name the place, the time, the date and chances are a small child has graced that floor or public venue with a writhing, kicking and screaming little body in full-on tantrum mode. Whenever I see one going on, that it when it doesn’t happen to be a child of mine, I always say a little prayer for that momma. A mean, it can be hard to raise a gifted child, right?

10. Making even the most mundane an adventure. Simply going to the store only to realize the bathroom is closed and your two-year old is about to wet her pants and you completely forgot the change of clothes? Yep. Driving somewhere and halfway into the trip you hear “I don’t feel so well” followed by vomiting? You know it. Walking to the post office and hearing, “Mom, the dandelions are so beautiful. Did you see that bird?” Love it.

Just a short list, but some of the things that my kids do so, so well. How about yours? What fantastic tricks are they up to these days? I’d love to know.

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